Navigating the Challenges of Picky Eating: Strategies for Parents

Picky eating is a common concern for parents, often leading to frustration and worry about their child's nutritional intake. It's the rare child who eats anything and everything, gamely taking on new vegetables, foreign cuisine, and walnuts in brownies. Instead, most kids (like most adults, only moreso) find some foods unpalatable. Vegetables are a frequent offender; processed desserts and chips typically aren’t. However, understanding the reasons behind picky eating and implementing effective strategies can transform meal times into more positive experiences.

Understanding Picky Eating

All children are picky eaters at some point or in some way during childhood; it's part of how they assert their independence. According to University Hospitals registered dietitian Abby Reinier, RD, pickiness generally peaks around age 3 or 4. This is when a child starts to become more independent and they may use their eating habits to exert a sense of control. Picky eating starts early - and stays. Researchers looked at the habits of children ages 4 to 9, and found that picky eaters tended to stay that way.

Picky eating is a common behaviour in early childhood. There is no universally accepted definition of picky eating, nor is there agreement on the best tool to identify it. ‘Causes’ of picky eating include early feeding difficulties, late introduction of lumpy foods at weaning, pressure to eat, and early choosiness especially if the mother is worried by this; protective factors include provision of fresh foods and eating the same meal as the child. The ‘consequences’ for the child’s diet include poor dietary variety and a possible distortion of nutrient intakes, with low intakes of iron and zinc (associated with low intakes of meat, and fruits and vegetables) being of particular concern. Low intakes of dietary fibre as a result of low intakes of fruit and vegetables are associated with constipation in picky eaters. There may be developmental difficulties in some children with persistent picky eating. There is little evidence, however, for a consistent effect of being a picky eater on growth trajectories.

Early Intervention and Prevention

That means that parents need to start early to prevent picky eating, preferably before their child turns 2 (and that independent streak really sets in). So offer lots of different foods, including lots of different fruits and vegetables. Don't cook a separate kids' meal. Let your child eat what you are eating (with one important exception: no choking hazards).

Temperament plays a role. Sometimes picky eating is part of a bigger problem, as opposed to its own problem. The study found that children who had difficulty controlling their emotions tended to be very picky eaters. What does this mean for parents? If your child has behavior challenges along with picky eating, talk to your doctor. Picky eaters are usually not underweight. They are often thinner than their less picky peers, but not in a way that is unhealthy.

The Role of Parenting

Parenting plays a role too. The researchers found that when parents were very strict about the foods that the child could (and couldn't!) eat, or were demanding about the child's eating, the child was more likely to be a picky eater. Some of that could be a chicken-or-egg thing: when a child seems picky, parents might be more likely to want them to eat healthy or high-calorie foods - and really want them to finish them.

Much of picky eating may be related to negative thoughts and memories about certain foods, or eating in general. The more that you are upbeat and positive about eating, the more likely your child will be that way too. Have family meals - and enjoy each other during them. Eating together puts the emphasis on the social aspect of eating, rather than the food itself, which can be helpful.

Don't force a child to eat. Encourage them to try new foods, but don't get into fights about it. And do not make them finish everything on their plate (the "clean plate club" my parents always encouraged us to be part of is not a good idea).

Practical Strategies for Parents

1. Family Style Meals

Share a meal together as a family as often as you can. This means no media distractions like TV or cell phones at mealtime. Use this time to model healthy eating. Serve one meal for the whole family and resist the urge to make another meal if your child refuses what you've served. This only encourages picky eating. Try to include at least one food your child likes with each meal and continue to provide a balanced meal, whether she eats it or not.

2. Avoid Food Fights

If your toddler refuses a meal, avoid fussing over it. It’s good for children to learn to listen to their bodies and use hunger as a guide. If they ate a big breakfast or lunch, for example, they may not be interested in eating much the rest of the day. It's a parent's responsibility to provide food, and the child’s decision to eat it. Pressuring kids to eat, or punishing them if they don't, can make them actively dislike foods they may otherwise like.

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3. Break from Bribes

Tempting as it may be, try not to bribe your children with treats for eating other foods. This can make the "prize" food even more exciting, and the food you want them to try an unpleasant chore. It also can lead to nightly battles at the dinner table.

4. Persistence is Key

Just because a child refuses a food once, don't give up. Keep offering new foods and those your child didn't like before. It can take as many as 10 or more times tasting a food before a toddler’s taste buds accept it. Scheduled meals and limiting snacks can help ensure your child is hungry when a new food is introduced.

5. Offer Variety

Offer a variety of healthy foods, especially vegetables and fruits, and include higher protein foods like meat and deboned fish at least 2 times per week. Help your child explore new flavors and textures in food. Try adding different herbs and spices to simple meals to make them tastier. To minimize waste, offer new foods in small amounts and wait at least a week or two before reintroducing the same food.

6. Make Food Fun

Toddlers are especially open to trying foods arranged in eye-catching, creative ways. Make foods look irresistible by arranging them in fun, colorful shapes kids can recognize. Kids this age also tend to enjoy any food involving a dip. Finger foods are also usually a hit with toddlers. Cut solid foods into bite size pieces they can easily eat themselves, making sure the pieces are small enough to avoid the risk of choking.

7. Involve Kids in Meal Planning

Put your toddler's growing interest in exercising control to good use. Let you child pick which fruit and vegetable to make for dinner or during visits to the grocery store or farmer's market. Read kid-friendly cookbooks together and let your child pick out new recipes to try.

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8. Cooking Together

Some cooking tasks are perfect for toddlers (with lots of supervision, of course): sifting, stirring, counting ingredients, picking fresh herbs from a garden or windowsill, and “painting” on cooking oil with a pastry brush, to name a few.

9. Food Bridges

Once a food is accepted, use what nutritionists call "food bridges" to introduce others with similar color, flavor and texture to help expand variety in what your child will eat. If your child likes pumpkin pie, for example, try mashed sweet potatoes and then mashed carrots.

10. Pairing Flavors

Try serving unfamiliar foods, or flavors young children tend to dislike at first (sour and bitter), with familiar foods toddlers naturally prefer (sweet and salty). Pairing broccoli (bitter) with grated cheese (salty), for example, is a great combination for toddler taste buds.

Seeking Professional Help

If you are concerned about your child’s diet, talk with your pediatrician, who can help troubleshoot and make sure your child is getting all the necessary nutrients to grow and develop. Also keep in mind that picky eating usually is a normal developmental stage for toddlers. Do your best to patiently guide them on their path toward healthy eating.

Severe picky eaters may need extra help from a professional to move beyond their limited eating choices. Prior to age 15, children often aren’t motivated to change. “They’re not unhappy about their picky eating, only their parents are,” says Dr. Dahlsgaard. How can you tell if your child’s habits are severe? Look for signs such as:

Being extremely unwilling to taste any new food, even after having it on her plate multiple times.
Extreme distress about food your child doesn’t prefer; for instance, she may avoid all bagels because she once found a seed on her bagel that she wasn’t expecting.
Developing aversions to foods she used to eat.

If you think your child is a severe picky eater, be sure to seek out a professional who has extensive experience treating the problem. At CHOP, psychologists like Dr. Dahlsgaard can help parents faced with this issue learn to use a method that rewards children for trying different foods and adding new options to their diet.

tags: #parenting #picky #eaters #strategies